April 2025
Welcome to the month of April.
April (Aprilis) is thought to stem from the Latin Aperio, meaning “to open”—a reference to the opening buds of springtime.
“April showers bring May flowers.”
“April is the kindest month, full of hope and renewal.”
“April is the time to dance in the rain… or run for cover.”
“April: The only month where you need sunscreen and a raincoat at the same time.”
“April is the time to plant seeds and watch them grow.”
“April is the month of rainbows, sunshine, and smiles.”
“May your days be as bright as the spring sun.”
“April is a reminder that brighter days are ahead.”
April Fool’s Day is one of the most entertaining holidays of the year. It’s a day where you can play enjoyable pranks on your friends and family. However, please be careful not to go too far with your jokes, as that could lead to dire consequences.
One of the greatest April Fools’ pranks of all time:
In 1989, a Seattle comedy show went on the air and said the city’s Space Needle had fallen down. It even had pictures. The news was a joke, of course, but that was little comfort to 700 panicky callers alarmed by the story.
May these short comments bring a smile to your face.
"I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member" Groucho Marx
"There's a thin line between to laugh with and to laugh at" Richard Pryor
I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender!" Rodney Dangerfield
"The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept" George Carlin
"I don’t exercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor" Joan Rivers
"Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?" Robin Williams
"The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age” Lucille Ball
"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night" Steve Martin
"I’m the only Jew who ever made a buck off of Nixon" Don Rickles
"My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met" Milton Berle
"Housework won’t kill you, but why take the chance?" Phyllis Diller
"I don’t need glasses, but I’ve reached the age where curiosity is greater than vanity" Red Skelton
"If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead" Johnny Carson
"Just because nobody complains doesn’t mean all parachutes are perfect" Benny Hill
"A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it" Bob Hope
"Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing" Redd Foxx
"The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day, you’re off it" Jackie Gleason
"The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was a genius" Sid Caesar
"If God had really intended man to fly, He’d make it easier to get to the airport" Jonathan Winters
"I’m not always funny. Sometimes I’m even mean, but I try to be funny" Carol Burnett
You ever notice how a dog is the only thing on Earth that loves you more than it loves itself? Meanwhile, my cat’s been planning my murder for years.
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.
People say money can’t buy happiness. But it buys bacon, and that’s close enough for me.
If your car is running I’m voting for it.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
This is my step ladder I never knew my real ladder.
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
I want to grow my own food but I can’t find bacon seeds.
Studies show that people with more birthdays live longer.
Why are mountains so funny? They’re hill areas.
I can always tell when someone is lying. I can tell when they're standing too.
“Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.”
“We may be getting older, but that doesn’t mean we have to be boring and act our age!”
“The older you get, the better you get. Unless you’re a banana.”
"Old people are just young people who have been alive for a very, very long time."
“Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.”
Have you ever been guilty of doing these things?
Reading directions on a box of food, throwing it in the trash, then retrieving it because you've forgotten everything already.
Hitting the elevator button multiple times.
Carefully inspecting an item at the grocery store because someone is standing in front of the one you actually want.
Calling someone "buddy" because you forgot their name.
Accidentally sending a text to the person you're talking about.
Eating a "family size" bag of chips by yourself.
Mumbling the name part during a rendition of "Happy Birthday."
Searching for your phone while holding it in your hand.
Offering some truly transparent fake laughter.
Carrying way too much from your car so you can "make it in one trip."
Buying a week's worth of fresh vegetables and not eating any of it.
Claiming you have plans to get out of a social function, even though you totally don't.
Taking out your phone to check the time, then getting distracted by it and totally forgetting what time it is.
Pulling back the shower curtain just to make sure there are no serial killers hiding behind there.
Checking your symptoms on the internet and convincing yourself you're on death's door.
Dancing by yourself in your kitchen.
Secretly diagnosing everybody in the waiting room at your doctor's office.
Porsche…..Fast
Ferrari…...Faster
Tesla…...…Fascist
“They say a person needs just three things to be truly happy in this world: Someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for.”
Have an awesome day and know that someone has thought about you today.
Live life for today.
Look for a single moment of joy each day.
Pray for tomorrow.
Cherish your blessings.
And visit with your precious memories often.
Thank you for visiting.
Your Ballard High School Class of 1966 Reunion Committee.